November 10, 2004
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“Trust your feelings, Luke!”
Yoda said that, or something like that, in Star Wars. I tell myself that, over and over again. I have to, having a legacy of years of pretty much using only half my brain–the left half, the logical, rational side. Not that there was all that much there anyway, thanks to a case of Narcissistic Personality Disorder that raged undiagnosed for most of my life. Sheesh–my yod must have been working overtime a lot of years. But I digress. There are times when I don’t “feel” like opening shop. I figure I’m just being lazy, ignore my feelings, open shop anyway and don’t do any business. But where I really have to be vigilant about trusting my feelings, or intuition, or the voices in my head, is when I do shamanic past life readings.
A lotta years ago, Kathy asked me if I could do a shamanic past life reading. I never had, nor had I ever heard of anyone doing one. In tribal cultures that I know of, folks don’t spend a lot of time thinking about past lives, being kinda busy surviving the current one. Anyway, I gave it a shot, and the rest is history. But it’s hard.
Like when I did the reading for a client who once died by drowning. Fine, now I know what it’s like to drown–not fun, I assure you. Ditto with the client who burned to death. Way not fun! But the hardest, the most challenging thing, is just believing what I “see” and hear, just trusting my guides, my intuition, whatever.
Sometimes the stuff I get seems so far-out, or so pat, or just so cliched—like when a client is a historical figure, or at least someone prominent– that I am uneasy, thinking that the client will either think I am totally nuts, or just fabricating this stuff out of whole cloth, playing some sort of Gypsy-like cold reading scam. But time and time again, the readings that I worry the most about are the ones that get the most validation. Kathy is great at this–often she will do a web search and dig up some historical stuff that fits hand in glove with the weird shit that popped into my pointy little head. Other times it will be the client who does the validating, and comes back to me with info that makes the reading make sense to me.
I am kind of like a sentient TV who sometimes makes value judgements on the programs it receives. The receiver thing is a very useful metaphor–you know how a radio gets a real strong signal in loud and clear, while a weak or distant signal just comes in fits and starts. For me, the “signal strength” is the degree of karmic significance the past life has. Sometimes the most intriguing lives to the client are the ones that are the least significant (this makes sense, now that I think of it–the insignificant ones are the least challenging, the easiest to deal with), they want more details than I can honestly give, and we both end up a tad frustrated. Best case scenario is, the client grows, maybe wakes up a little. Worst case scenario is, the client goes away mad and I get stiffed. But what the heck, I’m not in this for the money anyway.
Peddling knives and rocks and stuff feeds my body; doing shamanic work feeds my soul.
Comments (5)
I think you or kathy did a past life reading for me once and it was pretty neat
I got a chill reading this. It might have been ’cause my shirts got wet when I was outside and Doug just came in, letting in a bunch of cold air, but I think it was something you said.
I’m pleased that you’re getting back into the shamanic work. When you are doing it on a regular basis, it shines up your aura and your eyes.
It’s nice to see that there are folk out in this great big world who aren’t in the business of beeing ‘seers’ (only word I could come up with right now) to screw people out of money. And, not only, from what I read and feel about you two, are you REAL people who aren’t all gimmicky, you’re VERY good at what you do….And, to boot, you say it makes you, in the end, feel good about what you’re doing.
Thank you, both of you, for re-affirming my belief in those who choose to use their metaphysical talents.
i just got a comment today from kaioaty that said u did a past life reading for me. i thought it was very interesting, especially the part about the gypsy woman being captured in World War 2. personally, i think i’m a little obsessed with that particular war, and the circumstances around it (the Holocaust, etc.) but i’ve always been fascinated with gyspies and other mystical and magical things/ideas. thank you for taking time to do this reading for me, it proved to be very interesting and now i want to read more about what i was told.
nothing is as it appears on the surface, however, the surface often gives clues to what is behind….or at least validation of it.