March 14, 2005
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A Slight case of Auto-eroticism
God help me, I’m falling in love with a car–a van, really, a Mazda MPV. I didn’t intend to, really. It just sort of happened. I saw this thing parked on the strip near my flea market stand and my first thought was “Wow, that looks good,” followed by “But I could never afford it.” It looked almost new and I was sure it had at least a five-figure price tag on it, way out of my valley trash league. But I got closer and eyeballed it–it was a ’91, and the asking price was $2495. Gulp. Now this was still more than what I paid for my present car (Roger the Dodge, a 1988 Dodge Colt Vista) AND my wife’s car (Streak, a 1987 Subie wagon) put together. But, I thought, if the guy would take my vehicle in trade and finance it. . . the wheels started turning, so to speak.
Now I don’t really NEED a new car. My practice for the last few years has been to drive a car until it pukes, then scramble around and replace it with whatever I can get for around a grand. And Roger is running fine, never mind that he would give Ralph Nader a heart attack, being sort of a deathtrap. The front seat mounting bolts are, well, compromised, so that the whole seat would probably come off in a collision and crush me. The seatbelt doesn’t retract properly, is probably more cosmetic than functional. The windshield has half a dozen cracks and stars, which reduce visibility. One of the run-signal indicators does not work; neither does the rear-window washer. And to start up the heater fan, you have to alligator-clip two bare wires together–and that clip gets HOT after a few minutes. And it leaks a quart of oil every tank of gas, which isn’t real great for the environment. But it DOES run.
But the Mazda has four-wheel drive–a must, as far as I am concerned–and automatic transmission. I have driven sticks for the last forty years, but lately, shifting for myself is taking more and more of a toll on my bad shoulder and knee and ankle. I probably would not hurt so much so often with a slushbox. And the van sits a lot higher thanRoger, which would make for better visibility, and it is a lot roomier, which means I could stock more merchandise in it. And it looks sooo good. . . . .
This just in–I talked to my business consultant at Wells Fargo–I could get a business loan for the Mazda. But I need to consult with my partner, and decide for sure if I even for real want the thing. I guess the next step is to call the owner and arrange a test-drive.
Stay tuned for more news of my latest driving ambition.
Comments (8)
Your partner suggests taking it over for little Mike at G-Force to look and listen, or make a date with big Michael for his opinion, before you commit yourself.
Hah. Funny. I once wrote an erotica piece, which was a love story between me and my car. It was appropriately named “Autoerotica”. (Great minds think alike!)
I’m trying to figure out just how someone manages to fall in love with a Mazda, but I’m not getting anywhere.
^ It’s easy, if one is practical. The vehicle itself is immensely practical–I think MPV= multi-purpose vehicle. Word on the net is that it is comfortable, rugged, and reasonably reliable, as long as you stick with factory replacement parts and stay away from cheap off-brand stuff.
Plus, I loved the Mazda Miata when it first came out, and have always liked Japanese iron. One reason I like my Dodge so much is that it is a Mitsubishi in disguise.
I dunno, I’ve never liked Japanese cars much. Though honestly, I think it’s a packaging issue. Japanese cars are so… polite. They’re typically neutral and pleasant and usually come in neutral, pleasant colors. I remember when Mom worked for Nissan, she had the longest string of neutral colored cars of her life, mainly because they were the only non-pukey ones! This means I completely blame Nissan for some of her color choices over the last 10 or so years… Namely, since she went to Chrysler. Specifically, I blame them for the Solar Yellow Neon. Damn, that was bright…
Oooh, neat, I hope it works out!
My mother had a 92 mazda mpv and a mazda b2200 pickup truck before that. They’re actually very good vehicles. Somewhere in the mid-90s Mazda and Isuzu teamed up to get their cars built and Mazdas where never as well made after that.-at least according to a mechanic who’s a friend of my family. But the year model you’re talking about wouldn’t be affected by that.
You seem a kind, simple man, Mr. Merchant (as is myself, I like to think). I do believe the fanciest thing you own is that hat! I much admire it.